I am currently waiting. Waiting to miscarry our last hope for another baby. These are the worst kinds of wait. I have experienced them before. The wait for something horrible to happen that one knows is coming, over which you have absolutely no control. But this time, with this wait, there is an extra heaving… Continue reading the weight of the wait
Okay, first thing’s first, we have made it to nine weeks of pregnancy. Yay! We had our final ultrasound before our big move, yesterday. Doctor Fisch couldn’t be more pleased with our progress. HB of 177, measuring in range, yolk sac not too small this time, umbilical cord visible, and we even saw fetal movement.… Continue reading seven to eleven to maybe eight
not good news in the fertility world. 🙁 We did get pregnant. The transfer worked. We saw a heartbeat at seven weeks. We saw a another heartbeat, and growing baby, at 8.5 weeks. We went in at 10 weeks for a final ultrasound before we were to be sent off to the regular OB. No… Continue reading no news is…
I am a happy mom, which means a great emotional current has awoken inside of my body these past two years. I am visibly more emotional because my children’s happiness brings me insane amounts of joy. I am still getting used to having swells of positive emotion overtake my body, but it is a wonderful… Continue reading elephant in the room
Two Christmases ago we were in Washington when I found out that I was pregnant, again. It ended up being my most painful and prolonged miscarriage for many reasons. A truly horrible experience. Heck, I am still paying it off because we were uninsured for a brief time. Flashing forward to this Christmas…we headed back… Continue reading flashes of infertility
One of my closest friends and most trusted confidants announced to me last week that she is expecting. Shock, amazement, joy, wariness, concern, and gratefulness are all thoughts that traveled through my mind. I am grateful for her trust in me. I am concerned for her well-being and for that of the tiny little baby… Continue reading Friendship and Pregnancy
We lost our fourth baby this week. That’s the short of it. Part of me is numb, and part of me aches. I told Adam yesterday to give me a few days of ice cream and doing nothing, and I would be better. Three years ago I could not say that. But now, I know… Continue reading The Good, and the Bad!
Let’s be honest, this is kind of weird for me! I’m not used to blogging without cool pictures and awesome content like trips and holidays to draw inspiration from. I’m hoping this part of our blog site will be more like an adoption journal (including back journaling). There is so much about our fertility/adoption journey that I want to remember, preserve,… Continue reading Journal #1–What is this all about?